


start over again

by cresselia



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: F/M, kind of like that weird relationship where theyre friends with hints of wanting more, u feel me?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-13
Updated: 2014-06-13
Packaged: 2018-02-04 13:31:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1780861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cresselia/pseuds/cresselia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Two weeks after Jake returns from his undercover assignment, Teddy proposes to Amy in a bar, surrounded by all of their friends.</p>
            </blockquote>





	start over again

It shouldn't be so easy to slip out of your own engagement party, Amy thinks as she ducks out of the backdoors of the bar. 

To be fair, everyone was out for drinks before Teddy proposed. Jake had returned from his undercover assignment two months late two weeks ago, and the squad had taken to going out together nearly every night since. With all of their friends there drunk and in high spirits, Teddy had gathered everyone to attention, gently took hold of Amy's hand, and dropped down on one knee. 

She curses and fumbles with her lighter, trying to light the cigarette squeezed between her teeth. All she can focus on was the look of complete adoration on Teddy's face as he looked up at her hopefully and the complete dread that filled her body once he finished his speech. Her first instinct had been to run.

At least she waited until after giving her answer.

She finally manages to inhale when she hears the sound of the backdoor opening behind her. It has to be Teddy, and Teddy still doesn't know that she smokes on occasion. 

“Shit,” she mutters, dropping the cigarette to the ground and putting it out with her heel. 

“Amy?” The voice that calls her name out hesitantly is very much not Teddy's.

“Oh. Jake,” she breathes out in relief, spinning around with a small smile. “I thought you were-- Er, someone else.”

“Nope. Just me,” he teases, grinning at her and shoving his hands into the pockets of his jacket. “Hey, were you just-- You know what? Never mind. I saw you sneak out the back and just wanted to check on you. And offer my congratulations, of course.”

“You don't have to do that,” she says quietly, averting her gaze to the ground.

They haven't spoken about the night he left yet. It's rare for anyone to get alone time with Jake now – everyone crowds around him constantly – and their only time together is usually spent working on cases. Somehow the conversation doesn't feel appropriate to have while he throws paperclips at her across their desks, and when they all leave together after their shifts, Teddy is usually there to pick her up.

And, if she's being honest, the entire situation fills her with conflicting feelings. She spent nights obsessing over that confession, and even remembering it now makes her blush sometimes. She's not even sure if he still feels the same way anymore. Eight months is a long time, after all.

Jake laughs, even if it sounds a little forced. “It's okay, Amy. This is a good thing. You and Teddy are getting married. I'm actually happy for you.”

Something about that disappoints her. 

Amy Santiago doesn't do much day dreaming – and she hasn't had the chance since the proposal that occurred twenty minute ago – but there might have been a small, miniscule piece of her that hoped Jake would tell her he still had “romantic stylez” feelings for her and that he couldn't bear losing her to Teddy forever. 

Her mom watched a lot of soap operas, okay?

“Yeah?” she asks, glancing up. She hopes she's conveying the emotions she wants to.

“Yes,” he replies, looking completely genuine and honest. He smiles at her and holds out his hand. “Hey, let me see the rock. Boyle and I had shitty seats halfway across the bar.”

“Oh! Right!”

Amy reaches into her pocket and misses the confused look he shoots her. She drops the ring into Jake's hand and can't help but think about it. It's modest, but very pretty. She's never been a big fan of spectacle.

“Modest but impressive. The perfect Santiago ring,” Jake says with a low whistle.

Amy rolls her eyes and holds her hand back out. “Thanks.”

Instead of handing it back to her, Jake raises an eyebrow and closes his fist around the ring. Before Amy can snap at him, he's already speaking. “You can have this back when you tell me what's bothering you.”

“Nothing's bothering me! Give it back, Jake.” She's always been a horrible actress, and she can hear the lies in her own voice. “Come on, Teddy spent a lot of money on that.”

She lunges for it, only for Jake to hold it high above her head. He's not terribly taller than her with her heels on, but she still can't reach it. Even when she tries to jump for it.

“You suck,” she declares, slugging the arm not currently in possession of the ring.

“Oh, please,” he scoffs, “I've seen you bring down guys twice my size. If you really wanted this back, you'd have it.”

He's right, of course.

She decides to concede. “Fine. You get to know one thing that's bothering me. Then I get my ring back. Deal?”

He crosses his heart. “Scout's honor.”

“Were you even a boyscout?”

“Irrelevant.”

“Whatever, weirdo.”

She leans against the back of the building, and he takes a step to follow her, standing across from her. 

“I don't like being put on the spot,” she finally admits. “I know I said yes, but what if I had wanted to say no? I couldn't do that in front of all of our friends.”

A pain expression she can't quite read flashes across Jake's features for just a second before he finally hands her back the ring. He moves to stand next to her, leaning against the same wall.

“I'm sorry.”

“For what?”

“For putting you on the spot. Before I left.”

It's weird to her because she never really thought of it like that. Maybe during her angry phase, she'd thought of it, but it never rationally bothered her because she knew he hadn't done it to be cruel. 

“You didn't really have a choice,” she replies. “And you didn't do it to corner me. Neither did Teddy. You're both just idiots.”

“I really missed that Santiago charm while I was gone.”

It's a weak joke, but enough to break the tension between them. He chuckles weakly, and she actually lets out a hearty laugh. Her forehead rests against his shoulder when she finally catches her breath. She twists her head the slightest bit so she can look across from them again, still resting her head against him.

“You know how I'm really Type A?”

“I hadn't noticed.”

“Do you remember that show Scrubs?” She pauses, and Jake nods with bright eyes – she can tell he wants to elaborate, but she's in the middle of something. “Do you remember when Elliot planned her proposal? That was always kind of my dream once I saw it. I always imagined I could pick everything out in advance. My fiance, obviously. Where it would be, what he'd say, who would be there. I wanted all of my brothers there so I could rub it in their faces for all the times when we were little when they told me I was gross and I'd never get a boyfriend.”

“So, basically tonight was the exact opposite of what you wanted and that's why you're sulking,” Jake said.

“No,” she replies, furrowing her brow. “The weird thing is, I know what I wanted is impractical. Tonight was good – well, it should have still been good. But something about it still feels wrong to me.”

Neither of them speak for a beat, and she can feel the air practically thicken around them. That feeling she used to get when she'd think about the night he left starts filling her stomach again. 

The moment is ruined when Jake breaks the silence first, clearing his throat nervously.

“You don't have to do it, you know. Marry him. And I know I sound biased because, yeah, but seriously. You're my friend first, and--”

“Jake. Relax. I get it.”

“Okay, good. Because I don't want you to think I'd try to break you and Teddy up just because I have feelings for you too.”

It's the first time he's said it since he left, and for some reason, she didn't expect it to hit her like this. To make her chest feel light and expression soften. It's one thing to remember something she once heard and another to have him physically next to her, telling her again.

“I know you wouldn't,” she breathes out, shutting her eyes.

There's another beat of silence.

“I'm sorry I said that--”

“I don't think I want to marry him--”

Jake coughs. “Uh, you go first.”

“There are a few reasons,” she says, finally pushing herself away from the wall. “But I think I knew I didn't want this as soon as it was happening. And I wouldn't feel right leading him on.”

“And planning a wedding is expensive.”

She can't help but laugh. “Yeah. That too.” 

“I am sorry, though. For bringing, uh, that up again.”

She can feel her expression soften again. “Seriously, don't worry about it. You know I'd tell you if you were making me uncomfortable.”

“Yeah, that's true,” he replies, shrugging.

“I should probably go.”

He nods as she spins on her heel. Before she can make it to the door, something occurs to him. “Wait--”

“Huh?”

Jake walks over to her and holds out his hand. “The rest of the pack.”

Amy makes a face, but obliges and reaches into her pocket, handing the crumpled package over to him. 

“Those things'll kill you, you know.”

She can't help but smile at him, feeling a wave of affection rush over her. “Thanks.”

**Author's Note:**

> HELLO I'M ALIVE. may or may not write a sequel and/or chapter to this but i mostly write it because i love angst and i'm trying to get back into the b99 swing of things because i will be damned if i never finish my high school au story.


End file.
